Gnostic Sermon on Marriage

(This sermon was given by a gnostic priest at a public wedding ceremony.)

Sermon

I wish to begin today by reminding us all that marriage is sacred. While symbolized through rituals which we can find in every culture, and codified by various laws of the time and place, the reality of marriage goes well beyond these things.
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Its true source is something far beyond this terrestrial landscape. Let us remember that nothing comes from nothing, and therefore, everything comes from God.

Marriage is a union of two souls. Therefore, marriage transpires fundamentally, foundationally, between the souls of two people.

Our soul, of course, is connected with divinity. Yet, it yearns for something more, a deeper connection. The mystical traditions of every religion support this notion. We are but a spark of light looking to return to the great bonfire. The soul discovers its way home through the expression of love and the development of wisdom.

Love and Wisdom! These are the two pillars of marriage, and these are both gifts of God. It is up to us, our will, if we wish to fulfill what is offered before us. When two souls agree to congregate, they can build a church founded on these pillars.

To love is best! Love is divine. It does not matter how cliché it may sound: there is nothing better we can do with our life than to know how to love. Yet, without wisdom, we do not know what love truly is. Without wisdom, we remain confused. Being confused, we do things in the name of love, but which are wrong.

We confuse love with selfishness, and so, the comedies and tragedies of life are always ongoing. We make mistakes. We have problems. We suffer. We fight―​and our pain continues.

In Luke 21, Jesus says, “With patience ye shall possess thy souls.” This word patience is hypomonē in Greek. It means to bring forth fruit through endurance and perseverance. Marriage is just like this.
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The blossoming of marriage does not appear out of a simple dint of will though. In marriage, the couple must know how to fight! But not against each other. Each must learn to fight against their own selfishness.

If we observe nature, we can see that. Nothing in nature ever stays the same. If this place [the wedding venue] was left alone, it would fall to ruins, like many others you can see around this land. If you buy a car or a house, you have to continuously maintain it. Otherwise it will fall apart. If this can be said of the physical things of this world, what more can be said of marriage!

We are ever changing, in our hearts, minds, and soul. If we do not take care of our inner workings, things will surely fall apart. If we do not willfully change for the better, we implicitly change for the worse. No one ever stays the same. We are either growing or dying.

Sacrifice is a key component of marriage. Without it, there is no growth! But our ego is afraid of this, because it does not know what is beyond its little sphere of memories. It wants to keep itself just the way it is, and try to bend the world to its whims. The outcome of this type of habit is always painful.

It is said that love is content. But our ego is irritated.

It is said that love is peaceful. But our ego is angry.

It is said that love is valiant. But our ego is afraid.

When we sacrifice our irritation, we gain our contentment. When we sacrifice our anger, we gain peace. When we sacrifice our fear, we gain valor.

In short: when we sacrifice our ego, we gain love. We win our soul, and marriage between two souls is united on this point. It invokes the power of the cosmos, and truly nothing can stand in its way! This is the greatest ideal realized in humanity.

Love is not something that you add to your relationship to make it better. Love is already present, and it is your connection to the divine. It is not something you manufacture. It is a free and unlimited resource. Love is infinite abundance. It is our desires, our ego, which impedes and obscures it. When you remove what stands in its way, love is present, ready to give, ready to shine like a light unto the whole world, and those who are able to express it, benefit the world.

Most people do not know that the word sacrifice means "to make holy." If the seed does not sacrifice itself, the tree does not grow. The grape must be sacrificed to make the wine. The olive must be sacrificed to make the oil. The more you know how to sacrifice, the more you know how to love.

Our normal sense of self, the ego, hates this idea. It has everything backwards. It thinks happiness is achieved by accumulating things, money, by having a set of experiences or sensations, by gaining prestige and respect, and ensuring the world and their partner conforms to their whims. This is all a mistake. The truth is that our happiness and wellbeing always arrive from what is within us.

Every mystical tradition affirms that the soul can and should undergo a great transformation in order to know divinity in greater and greater ways. Marriage is a wonderful opportunity for two souls to work in cooperation towards this lofty goal.

When anger, frustration, jealousy, or impatience appears, we should not justify their existence in us. Neither should we run away from them, hiding or repressing them.

Instead, we should see them, directly as they are, understand them, and eliminate them. From this perspective, we should be thankful when our partner brings out the worst in us. Why? Because when our worst parts are exposed, it makes it easy to know precisely what we need to sacrifice. 

The journey of marriage contains all things. It will give you great happiness. You will have seasons abundant with joy and laughter. And even when [the groom] makes a horrible joke, you’ll laugh because you love him. You will also have times of difficulty, as everyone does, and it is then that you have the greatest opportunity to change, to reignite the flame of your heart, and gain the wisdom which comes from sacrifice. And with that, greater joy arrives.
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Love is infinite. Love is limitless. Wisdom is knowing this, and that is why the wise soul gives it away freely.

Officiant Addresses the Couple

[The couple stands in front of the officiant to be addressed. Audience remains seated.]

The Book of Genesis (2:18) says that Adam deserved a mate. In Hebrew, this is Ezer Kenegdo עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ (AY-zer kuh-NEG-doh). Ezer means "helper," a powerful helper. Kenegdo means "to be opposite of," or "face-to-face with." 

So each of you must face each other with humility. Seek forgiveness for your errors, for your mate will often see your errors vividly, and you will see theirs. You must be each other’s counterpart, a helper for them, a source of strength for them. When you help each other correctly, your love and wisdom will increase.

If you cannot do this, there is another interpretation of the letters. Your mate becomes your opposition. You will oppose each other, and your marriage will fail.

Therefore: you must become awake, aware, and sensitive to all of that which transpires within you. Sacrifice your selfishness. Love your mate.

If you do this, you shall take what is dense and obscure within you, and transform it into that which will uplift you, inspire you, and provide levity and light to your marriage.

Hermes Trismegistus says as much:

Separate that spirituous earth from the dense or crude by means of a gentle heat, with much attention. In great measure it ascends from the earth up to heaven, and descends again, newborn, on the earth, and the superior and the inferior are increased in power. By this wilt thou partake of the honors of the whole world. And Darkness will fly from thee. This is the strength of all powers. With this thou wilt be able to overcome all things and transmute all what is fine and what is coarse. ―​Emerald Tablet by Hermes

If you know how to sacrifice in this way, together, you will transform your marriage into a Holy Matrimony.